The lady that she was

I met this lady about 4 years ago when she came home to see her grandson’s fiance (me).

The first striking thing about her is how she adapted herself to the people around and got into relevant conversations! Just give her a dot and she would narrate an entire story around it – from ants to zebras , she would have anecdotes for them all!
She could speak about property and finances and politics and family drama to her daughters while at the same time speak about movie songs and food choices and sports trivia to her grand kids – Versatile in every right!

While I see many in her generation not willing to get out of their comfort zones and adapt to the changing lives around , here she was willing to go out on a night drive with her grand kids to try out the newest ice cream parlor in town or accompany us on a trip to the mall and have a fulfilling thali at Rajdhani! She’s cool or what?

My favourite memory of her is having her at Pune during Navratri last year, making sure we dressed up everyday in the brightest of sarees , clicking innumerable pictures , having a bowl of sundal while listening to my songs and bonding with everyone who came home to visit! My friends in Pune would agree with me on this!

Being helpful came naturally to her. She was the biggest asset of the family and will always be!

Even 20 days back when the dreaded enemy invited itself into her body, she wanted to sit down and make bolis and murukku for diwali and here we are sitting and complaining about the slightest headache and cold!

I’ll miss seeing Vignesh singing ‘Kannu irandum Minna minna’ and making her smile with a cute shy.
I’ll miss sitting down with her every evening with a plate of sweets and savories.

I’ll miss listening to her describing every little action of Shreyas after watching his videos! One regret I have is to have taken her along with me to Pune and making her spend time with her ‘great grandson’. Nevertheless, he’s going to hear a lot of stories about her from me when he grows up!

I’ll miss her cute duck walk vigorously adjusting her saree pallu , walking out of her room with a smile and sitting on the sofa like a queen ready with a bucket full of tales to tell!

I’ll miss seeing her anxiously waiting for the half hour mark to hit for her first cup of coffee after the thyroid medicine and saying ‘Mala , 20 mins aayiduthu. Kuduthudu di coffee’!
I’ll miss her countless stories about how she made the most amazing dosas or how she lived in a forest with other families of all religions and developed a strong bond or how thatha lovingly used to say ‘en di Saroja’ for every little thing.

Kind , ever smiling , generous , affectionate, humorous and so much more. When I left my mom’s place before Shreyas’s arrival , I had a bag from First cry in my hand and she instantly told my mom ‘call me when you hear the first cry!’ – she totally nailed situational humor!

She was one of a kind and I’m glad I had these 4 years to spend with her and that’ll remain etched in my heart!

In a world where giving compliments have become like an ego issue , she gave them away generously and that’s one thing everyone should learn! Be it making a coffee or buying a saree for her , she appreciated them all with a happy face!

It was crushing to see her lying in that rectangle case. But to think about the volume of goodness she must have committed that didn’t let her suffer more , makes me believe more in God.

She is probably in a happier space rekindling the romance with her dearest husband and both of them are looking down on all of us and showering their love!

She truly was a woman like no other and just like everyone in the family, I’ll miss her.

Paati , I love you and I miss you. Thank you for making me feel like your own grand daughter 🙂

A beginner’s guide to cloth diapering

For years together, cloth has been the primary material used as nappies or langots as they are traditionally called. With some additions of modern technology, we have coined a new term for it known as ‘cloth diapering’. Rather than having to change after every pee , cloth diapers can be put on for a longer duration since they have soakers made of several layers of organic cotton – an eco friendly alternative to disposable diapers! They also come in one size and the same diaper can be used from birth until potty training!

Before baby S was born , I read a lot about this and was only getting more intimidated and confused. Soakers , boosters, cover, AIO , bamboo , charcoal and what not. Once I got hands on into this experience, I started understanding the terms and usage better. You finally get to understand that it isn’t rocket science.

So if you are a new mom , read on and hopefully it makes a difference to your little one’s diapering journey!

Where do you begin?

1. Cloth nappies (aka langots) – Traditionally, they were made out of folding cotton dhotis or sarees. They hold one pee and have to be changed immediately. These are now readily available in stores. My advice would be to have in hand atleast 2-3 dozens in case of sudden weather changes which might affect the laundry and drying schedule.

Store recommendations – Naidu hall (Chennai). They have a wide range of nappies in sizes from 0 to XL starting from INR 45. Though velcro nappies are easy to use , the tying ones last longer.

Firstcry – Nappies from the brand Baby hug are a good value for money!

2. Boxers and bloomers – Especially after they turn over, nappies might not be too useful and there comes boxers and bloomers. I personally find it difficult with these since the entire area where the baby lies gets wet because of the low absorption capacity.

Stores where you can find good ones are Naidu hall (Chennai) , my little one (Chennai) and firstcry.com

3. Cover diapers – Simply put , these are diapers with an outer shell and a snappable soaker. These soakers need to be changed once they are fully used up and the cover can be used with another soaker. Investing in a couple of covers and more soakers would do the trick. I personally prefer and recommend using covers and soakers of the same brand together.

4. All-in-one (AIO) – these are diapers with an outer shell and snapped on soaker but have to be changed entirely after the soaker gets used up. Generally, these are used for night time diapering but I prefer it for day time use as well. Majority of these come with the option of using more than 1 soaker at once in order to increase the absorption capacity and duration.

Brand recommendations – I tried a few brands and these are two brands which I would vouch for. What works for me might not work for you. Always invest in a few brand diapers before deciding on what’s best for your baby and then build a stash. Join Facebook groups to get 24*7 support. Once you get the fit right , there’s no looking back!

1. Superbottoms – this is the first brand I tried and they have never failed to impress. I used their new born diapers a few times before moving on to the free size diapers. My order of preference would be UNO > COVER > BASIC. UNO looks the trimmest on my boy. Basic diapers are an economical option to try before investing in the other ranges.

2. A toddler thing – Both their cover diapers and Bumkin diapers are worth a buy. The cover diapers are super trim and do not look bulky.

The number of diapers required depend on

1. What kind of a wetter your baby is (for instance , the cover diapers which are supposed to last for a minimum of 4 hours last only for 2.5 – 3 hours on my boy).

2. Laundry cycle – the soakers sometimes take more than a day to dry especially during monsoons. While building a stash , this is an important thing to consider.

3. Usage – full day or only for nights or only for day time.

Based on the above , you can slowly build your stash. I have not built my stash entirely. It takes a while and I’m slowly moving away from disposable diapers. I can’t stop using them all of a sudden. I’m taking it one step at a time.

Few questions which arise in the minds of moms and people around –

1. One diaper costs INR 900! Isn’t that a lot?

Well, let’s say you need 10 of these diapers until potty training which makes it INR 9000. One disposable diaper on an average costs INR 12.

Monthly (assuming 3 diapers/day) = INR 1080

Assuming at 24 months , your baby is potty trained , you would have spent INR 25,920 just for diapers which are non bio degradable and stays in the landfill for about 400 years!! If that’s not convincing enough to start the change , I don’t know what would be!

2. It looks bulky on the child –

Yes! It definitely is bulkier than a disposable diaper. But babies adjust and acclimatize to change easily. Keep making them wear these diapers and within a few days they’ll feel comfortable in them.

3. Will it delay milestones of the baby?

Duh. Not at all! Each kid is different and a cloth diaper won’t determine when they achieve their milestones!

4. Washing it is a hassle – Again , is isn’t rocket science. You need to do a pre wash and then a main wash with a no additive detergent like surf excel (you can check with the brands for a detailed wash routine).

They are available in a lot of cute prints which make it an attractive buy and also a great gifting option!

Cloth diapering might seem difficult and mind boggling. But once you get the brand and fit right, there’s no looking back!

I still have some days when the diaper leaks due to wrong fit or wash routine. I’m figuring it out and not giving up on it! It definitely is a skill which we become experts at with practice. Keep trying and one day you’ll be the masters of it!

Happy cloth diapering!

Let’s give our kids a sustainable lifestyle starting from today 🙂